Minky & Me

This is an email between Layr and his sister, Aimée. Aimée has a two year old son, Eli.

On Oct 20, 2005, at 8:08 PM, Aimee wrote:

Eli used a new descriptive word at dinner tonight. He said “what is
that nasty stuff, I don’t like that nasty stuff”. It was very hard to
keep a straight face while explaining to him that nasty stuff wasn’t
really a nice thing to say, even if it was used to describe celery.

I hope he got it from someone at school but I usually notice myself
using these expressions after I hear them come out of his mouth. Oh
well I guess it could be worse.

Aimee

—————–

I was lost in the car one night last week and Coco learned worse words
than ‘nasty’. She seems to have forgotten them, but maybe she’s just
saving them for when she’s lost.

Layr

Six months ago I bought a replica of Minky’s favorite stuffed animal, Willard. Willard is Minky’s “transitional object,” meaning: the stuffed animal she falls asleep cuddling. Baby experts must have to work hard to come up with appropriate sounding terminology for those parents seeking authoritative reassurance.

Layr and I thought we should have back-up in case, god forbid, we ever lost Willard. He’s left the realm of the crib much more lately and in doing so has risked being lost. He’s a consummate professional, though, and has taken his in increasing duties in stride.

When Minky started at daycare I worried about sending Willard in the morning and remembering to fetch him, along with Minky, at the end of the day. The attachment is so great that there would be no sleeping at home without him. The apprehension about doing this was rattling around the back of my brain when it dawned on me. Time to break out the DECOY!

For a dry run one night at bedtime, when I was actually trying to avoid running back downstairs to find the real Willard, I grabbed the decoy out of the closet, ripped off his tag and shoved it toward a crying Minky. She took one look and said “Willard,” in a pathetic way which meant “you’ve-given-me-an-imposter.” Down the stairs I ran.

In hindsight, my original thought of just handing over a brand new stuffed animal to replace a well-worn loved one was stupid. It’s funny how you can think, “oh that’ll work GREAT.” Then Minky, in her own way, without malice or blame, brings into sharp focus the foolishness of some of my ideas.

Now Willard and Wrong Willard sit side by side in the crib. Some mornings, like today, Minky will bring both into our bedroom for our morning nursing but forget about trying to pass off the fake. Even after Wrong Willard’s first bath, a bath that made his fur look worn like the real Willard, she still can spot him from a mile away.

Curiously, I’ve taken to calling them “Willard and Willard, the great comedy duo from the 1950’s.” I don’t know why.

There is something about carrying a toddler; it’s heaven. I believe it’s extra yummy because toddlers don’t need you to carry them like you did when they were babies. At twenty months it’s all about exploration.

Most of the time when Minky is carried it’s against her will and she struggles to get down. It never makes me sad that she wants to get away so desperately. But when, like last night, she’s awakened not long after going to bed, I get my chance to hold on to her tight and feel that warm, heavy little body against mine for a little while.

I’ll miss how good it feels to carry her in my arms as she gets older.

“Honey, tomorrow we go to sing-a-long to hear music.”

“Moogat?”

“Yes, music.”

“Zacky!”

“Yes, with Zachary.”

The preoccupation du jour is jumping. Tonight walking Rocky, Minky jumped off of the same curb about twelve times. Then after her bath she jumped off of a stool in her bedroom many many times. In order to get maximum enjoyment out of the jumping she needed to fetch a book or stuffed bear and clutch them as she jumped.

The jumping itself looks pretty hysterical. There is a lot of superfluous knee bending. In fact it almost looks like some sort of jig gone wrong.

What a girl!

Not long after Minky was born I began a funny little tradition. Each night before taking her up to bed, I sing Minky “So Long, Farewell,” from the Sound of Music. Though my husband abhors that musical he has been pretty good about going along with it. We’ll even attempt to harmonize on some nights. When The Brawn and Sinéad are here they join in.

Tonight after a rough dinner with a crying baby who couldn’t express what she wanted except through tears, I played the song from the movie soundtrack. Minky had never heard the actual recording, just our warbled rendition. Daddy held her and spun her in a circle just like they do in the movie, as I did the same. She looked on with interest, like an anthropologist studying a newly discovered, reclusive tribe. Like I said, it’s a funny little tradition.

Since I’m still feeling under the weather from bronchitis, I decided this morning to forego our usual Friday date with our friends Lis and Zachary and instead try to “take it easy.” I’m not very good at taking it easy especially since we’ll be moving in six weeks and there is a ton to do. I did manage to fall asleep for three hours while Minky slept which hopefully helped in some important way that has yet to become apparent.

I was somewhat dreading the long afternoon stretching out in front of us with no where to go and rain pouring steadily down. It’s been gray for days now (I’m convinced the Gods must be angry at George W Bush). Remarkably though the Hot Chocolate and I had a great time.

Part of what made it great was getting presents in the mail. Maney sent Minky Happy Cockerel. It’s a sweet book that makes a noise when you open the last page. That kind of gimmick is a real hit with the under two crowd, I tell ya. I had remembered my mother saying something about a gift but didn’t realize it was on its way. There are several books in the series and we own another called Hungry Pig. It’s adorable. A week ago I ordered two books, Dogzilla and Kat Kong, and they finally arrived. They are a bit mature for Minky but at some point she’ll really like them. I read Dogzilla aloud to Layr and The Brawn during dinner.

What also made the afternoon fun was playing “get you” which is pronounced “gitchoo.” Minky finds that game endlessly entertaining and will often decide not to walk down the stairs toward me and instead turn around and trot off saying, “gitchoo.” It’s priceless. This get you was a bit different though because I’d run and hide. She’d be headed down the hall toward me and I’d jump out and say, “boo!” Once she jumped a mile. I was prepared for instant tears since she was quite startled but she just laughed.

Layr walked by our new house Sunday night and heard some voices a ways down the street. He, Minky and Rocky had gone to the pharmacy and had to stroll by our new place before heading home. The voices turned out to be our new neighbors, Laura and Brian and their kids, whom we had met the day of the open house. Layr greeted them and announced that we had bought the house next door. Laura was so happy she said, “let me hug you.”

Laura and Brian were instrumental in our putting in an offer. The day we met them we got into a conversation in their backyard and they asked us if we wanted to take a look at what they had done in their house – both are colonials. I got such a good feeling about them as we talked that when we left, Layr knew I had made up my mind. I went from maybe to I-have-to-have-that-place in less than a half hour.

On Sunday night, Laura and Brian had just come from a neighborhood birthday party when Layr met up with them. They said, “come and meet other people in the neighborhood,” so Layr got introduced to more friendly people that we’ll soon be living around the corner from.

Rocky was a real hit. It is a big kitty-fest over there and the possibility of having a dog nearby made everyone positively giddy. One little girl said to Layr, “we’re getting a dog as soon as our cat dies.”

There is a lot besides our new house going on. I’ll be observing a third grade class for the third week in a row tomorrow. Minky is doing well at her daycare. I love the class I’m taking. I signed up today to take the MTEL tests in November, which you need to do as part of the application process at the school I’m attending. There’s lots more but I’ve got to go to bed. I’m recovering from bronchitis. That’s a whole other story.